Most gay men already know that the more masculine you present in online dating profiles, the more interest you will attract.I’ve always known that, aside from being black, my feminine, flowing, chest-length locks were the greatest deterrent to my own success, which is why I logged off altogether for a while.Plus, femme girls don’t want to be with a man, or they would be. Amazingly, many people don’t understand a butch – femme relationship at all and in some cases, they are convinced that the butch girl is a man anyway, despite what they are told.However, playing with people’s perceptions, expectations and assumptions are all part of the territory when it comes to butch-femme relationships.My greatest strength is my personality, and I’m not very photogenic.Add that to the fact that black men are virtually invisible on online dating sites (unless you are in the top 5 percent of musculature and attractiveness) compared to white men (who can be completely average in every way and still fill a social calendar), and it became clear to me that looking for dates on the Internet was pointless for me, personally.
Butch women don’t want to be men, they just like the more masculine image.The thing about identity is that we label to validate ourselves, and to form bonds with others like us, but at the end of the day, there really aren’t strict definitions and rules you have to follow to belong on any part of the spectrum.Just like there’s no such thing as not looking gay enough, there’s no such thing as not being butch enough, or not being femme enough.Firstly, take off the jeans then slip off the dress. Totally hot and totally cool and a time for gender playtime. One likes the hairdressers, painted nails and sexy dresses.The other likes jeans, sports and drinking from a pint.That said, I ended up in West Hollywood last month all by myself.